my life has landed upside down
on main street, topsy turvy town.
the storm has come and brought the night –
darkness has obscured the light.
blindly now i view this matter,
busy mind goes chitter-chatter.
round and round and round it goes,
hiding deftly what it knows.
as it spins and spins some more
rage shrieks from it’s blackened core.
thoughtless thoughts think i am thinking.
sightless eyes look outward blinking.
busy body does my doing:
walking, talking, drinking, chewing.
blob of brain does my mind’s bidding.
am i confused! who am i kidding?
it is my mind, it’s not my brain
that has driven i insane.
the thought that i was on my own
seemed to expel me from my home.
now i wander lost and lonely,
and i think if i had only …..
too late now though, hope is lost –
think it’s i who pays the cost.
pricey little misadventure
paid by me through full indenture.
imprisoned now with locks made double
happiness replaced by trouble.
storm keeps raging round the i,
drowning out this soft reply:
without the i the storm stops spinning
just as it was before beginning.
no life has landed upside down.
no i exists to spin around.
no fear, no pain, no i to suffer.
no loss an i needs to recover.
no silly thoughts think silly business.
no tiny i-thought thinks of is-ness.
think what that means, i think i think.
my mind must be my missing link.
what a laugh to be so serious
that i spun myself delirious!
so what is it that i should do
to help this stormy i unscrew?
i practice smiling from within,
as i learn, to my chagrin –
it was i who was the culprit,
not that lecture from the pulpit.
not my mom, no, not my dad,
not all the troubled past i had.
not anything but my decision –
(…just a tiny i incision)
cut in two my peace of mind
leaving i quite misaligned.
so this is what i try to do:
see another as i too.
failing this, practice forgiveness –
(the only thing that is my business).
taking back my misperception,
making room for the correction.
turning back around again,
undoing my belief in spin.
decide to make the other choice:
listen for the small, soft voice.
gently comes the soundless sound,
deep within the stillness found.
all the raging storm has ceased,
disquiet is replaced by peace.
upside-down is held upright,
while darkness passes into light.
unheeded now, the i is gone,
making way for true light’s dawn –
not seen by i, but held in mind,
forever home in peace divine.